Ask Mental Game Coach Jared Tendler

[_BadaBing_]

Jugular Vein

Snipers are able to slow the heartbeat way down which allows them deadly pinpoint accuracy before pulling the trigger. I want to transpose this ability into my poker game with regard to my pulsing jugular vein so that it won't be a tell to others at the table I can read people very well mostly at first glance but even better after chatting with them a few moments - my hands never shake - I can stare a lot of players off their hand - don't play with my chips - and if someone tries talking me out of a hand I am able to completely ignore them with my extreme focus on the game and winning BUT my jugular vein acts against me for example when I'm sure my opponent has me but I'm still thinking of a reraise or just prior to pulling off a decent bluff the pulsing if they notice gives me away giving my opponent an edge. I haven't been playing poker very long and I want to take this out of the equation when I play from now on - so my question is - what kind of mind set will help me accomplish this? Thank you.

 

[Worak]

Snipers are able to slow the heartbeat way down which allows them deadly pinpoint accuracy before pulling the trigger. I want to transpose this ability into my poker game with regard to my pulsing jugular vein so that it won't be a tell to others at the table I can read people very well mostly at first glance but even better after chatting with them a few moments - my hands never shake - I can stare a lot of players off their hand - don't play with my chips - and if someone tries talking me out of a hand I am able to completely ignore them with my extreme focus on the game and winning BUT my jugular vein acts against me for example when I'm sure my opponent has me but I'm still thinking of a reraise or just prior to pulling off a decent bluff the pulsing if they notice gives me away giving my opponent an edge. I haven't been playing poker very long and I want to take this out of the equation when I play from now on - so my question is - what kind of mind set will help me accomplish this? Thank you.

I'd consider wearing a scarf or a hoody that covers your neck.

 

[_BadaBing_]

Humm maybe that's why Dario Minieri wears those big scarfs even in hot weather. Not sure but thanks for the suggestions though.

 

[Jared Tendler]

Snipers are able to slow the heartbeat way down which allows them deadly pinpoint accuracy before pulling the trigger. I want to transpose this ability into my poker game with regard to my pulsing jugular vein so that it won't be a tell to others at the table I can read people very well mostly at first glance but even better after chatting with them a few moments - my hands never shake - I can stare a lot of players off their hand - don't play with my chips - and if someone tries talking me out of a hand I am able to completely ignore them with my extreme focus on the game and winning BUT my jugular vein acts against me for example when I'm sure my opponent has me but I'm still thinking of a reraise or just prior to pulling off a decent bluff the pulsing if they notice gives me away giving my opponent an edge. I haven't been playing poker very long and I want to take this out of the equation when I play from now on - so my question is - what kind of mind set will help me accomplish this? Thank you.

Thanks for the welcome!

Interesting question - I'll admit you're the first asking me specifically to help them keep their jugular inside their skin. It's sounds like nerves/pressure. As you mention, you're mostly about to control it, but these spots get to you. Why do you think that is?

 

[LuckyChippy]

Humm maybe that's why Dario Minieri wears those big scarfs even in hot weather. Not sure but thanks for the suggestions though.

Pretty sure he does it cause he's Italian. Those guys be crazy.

 

[_BadaBing_]

Thanks for getting back on this Jared Well I have pretty much taken care of myself since age seven -as such I became how shall I say this? - street smart at that age but it has allowed me to have a great advantage in a lot of different and varied arenas while growing up and has made me alert and aware of everything and everyone around me 24/7 to the extreme with a very high percentage of correctness on my take in any given situation. Though a beginner at playing poker I'm beyond competitive in everything I take on in life from the most mundane of tasks to the most important. Also though it probably won't matter about my jugular because it might be a bluff or a win or a losing hand so my opponent would have to guess but I want as close to perfection as I can get. Having said that I just wondered if there might be a mind set for the likes of me to not show those emotions while playing poker to gain the advantage over as many players as possible. Thank you.

 

[Jared Tendler]

Thanks for getting back on this Jared Well I have pretty much taken care of myself since age seven -as such I became how shall I say this? - street smart at that age but it has allowed me to have a great advantage in a lot of different and varied arenas while growing up and has made me alert and aware of everything and everyone around me 24/7 to the extreme with a very high percentage of correctness on my take in any given situation. Though a beginner at playing poker I'm beyond competitive in everything I take on in life from the most mundane of tasks to the most important. Also though it probably won't matter about my jugular because it might be a bluff or a win or a losing hand so my opponent would have to guess but I want as close to perfection as I can get. Having said that I just wondered if there might be a mind set for the likes of me to not show those emotions while playing poker to gain the advantage over as many players as possible. Thank you.

You sound like an interesting guy - be fun to grab a beer sometime.

The simple answer to your questions is to remove the causes of what's going to cause your emotions to spike. What is it about a bluff, winning, or losing that causes your emotions to get jacked up. If it's just being competitive, then I'd suggest adding other ways to determine what you're competing for. Ie. with a bluff, your competing to be the absolute best at representing the cards you want to rep with them. If it's losing, you want to be the absolute best at knowing the realities of poker, so you can determine whether or not you have actually lost because you played poorly, or whether you lost and are just not being rewarded for your quality play.

What do you think?

 

[Jared Tendler]

Just a quick little spammy post. As my new signature says, I'm having a big promotion to celebrate getting on Amazon.

As many of you know from my posting here, this book is not a just another poker psychology or poker mindset book. It’s a true advancement in the field and contains a complete strategy to help players permanently, not just temporarily, solve mental game problems like tilt, motivation, confidence, etc.

The book is getting solid reviews so far! There are a few on Amazon already, and here's a sampling of what's been posted in the media:




"Tendler and Carter also take a fresh approach and give you actionable things you can do to improve your mental game but also measure your improvement."
- Bill Rini, Legendary Blogger

"Raises the bar so high for poker mindset books, other thinkers may not be able to clear it."
- Jack Welch, Poker Author, Editor & Player

"Tendler provides real steps and real answers for poker players involved in the day to day struggle who are too often beating themselves."
- Jesse May, partypoker

"This book contains advice that simply isn't out there."
- Matt Perry, Bluff Europe

"I'm a tilt monkey and finished the book with the confidence knowing I can diminish tilting at the tables."
- Paul "Tao Pauly" McGuire, Author, What is Jack Tripper Stole My Dog?

"This book is the first of its kind and should be considered mandatory reading for any poker player."
- Hunter Bick, DragTheBar CEO

"Quite simply it is the only book you will ever need regarding the mental side of poker."
- Matthew Pitt, betfair

"The book is full of so many ways to help you improve your emotional control that they are literally spilling out from the pages."
- Lee Davy, Poker Journalist

"Concisely written, painstakingly detailed and fantastically insightful."
- Daniel Smyth, WPT Magazine

"I now easily see how losing players continue to be losing players...they are, 'Mental Game Fish.'"
- Rey, [ame="http://www.amazon.com/gp/pdp/profile/A36VVY01E0H6ZZ/ref=cm_cr_pr_pdp"]Customer[/ame]

"Jared Tendler's book is by far and away the most advanced Poker book out there"
- Colin, [ame="http://www.amazon.com/gp/pdp/profile/A1AYGPXR2CGI59/ref=cm_cr_pr_pdp"]Customer[/ame]

"This is the most advanced, detailed information in one spot that I have ever seen on the mental side of poker."
- Charley, Customer

 

[Poker Orifice]

Great reviews there Jared. Will be adding your book to my collection for sure!!

 

[_BadaBing_]

Same here Jared

Thanks for your candor - in rereading both your replies I realize that I don't need to be on point 24/7 instead I'll attempt to concentrate on my opponent and how best to win the hand to the exclusion of all else at least while in a hand.

 

[Jared Tendler]

Great reviews there Jared. Will be adding your book to my collection for sure!!

Nice! I'll look forward to seeing what you think.

 

[Jared Tendler]

Same here Jared

Thanks for your candor - in rereading both your replies I realize that I don't need to be on point 24/7 instead I'll attempt to concentrate on my opponent and how best to win the hand to the exclusion of all else at least while in a hand.

Your welcome. I'm glad to hear you've come to some solid insight on this. Stop back if you have other questions, or want to talk (type) some things out.

 

[Poker Orifice]

Jared,
I hate losing to sh**y players. Poker can kinda suck when you set up villain, have him either bluffing off his stack, getting it in real bad, calling off when you're shoving with top of your range (< for deceptioin).. doing EVERYTHING you want them to do.. & then they donk ya ftw! weeeee ... lol (can you tell it just happened on a few hands? 'tournament play').
I realize I'm supposed to love these guys & yes they are VERY easy to play against (they're the donks I'm targetting/isolating, etc. knowing they'll chip me up nicely). It is these same players I seem to lose the biggest pots to, in the most crucial times.

How do I get my heart to match my head (knowing is one thing, accepting is another). Oh... yah.. I try to play w/o emotion... but I am EXTREMELY competitive by nature (in Everything.. & always have been.. & do know where it comes from > in my family you played to win or you didn't play at all.) It has helped me in some areas, ie. discipline, willingness to put in time & effort to improve, etc.
Ok.. I just 'donked' the donk (& feel good about it, lol). Me thinks me needs to get out & purchase a copy of your new book... & soon (I've read some Great reviews about it!). I do know this is the weakest part of my game (emotions) but do work on it.

 

[Poker Orifice]

Just watching a clip of you in an interview at wsop on PokerNews. Cool
http://www.pokernews.com/video/wsop-2011-mental-game-strategy-with-jared-tendler-1062353465001.htm

 

[Jared Tendler]

Jared,
I hate losing to sh**y players. Poker can kinda suck when you set up villain, have him either bluffing off his stack, getting it in real bad, calling off when you're shoving with top of your range (< for deceptioin).. doing EVERYTHING you want them to do.. & then they donk ya ftw! weeeee ... lol (can you tell it just happened on a few hands? 'tournament play').
I realize I'm supposed to love these guys & yes they are VERY easy to play against (they're the donks I'm targetting/isolating, etc. knowing they'll chip me up nicely). It is these same players I seem to lose the biggest pots to, in the most crucial times.

How do I get my heart to match my head (knowing is one thing, accepting is another). Oh... yah.. I try to play w/o emotion... but I am EXTREMELY competitive by nature (in Everything.. & always have been.. & do know where it comes from > in my family you played to win or you didn't play at all.) It has helped me in some areas, ie. discipline, willingness to put in time & effort to improve, etc.
Ok.. I just 'donked' the donk (& feel good about it, lol). Me thinks me needs to get out & purchase a copy of your new book... & soon (I've read some Great reviews about it!). I do know this is the weakest part of my game (emotions) but do work on it.

PO - it's a challenge to have your emotions match the logic in your head, but in order to be able to do it, you must first understand why that split even occurs. The basic deal is that emotions/heart require A LOT more proof/evidence/training before they become completely organized around what you know to be true in your head. So on the one hand you simply need to master what you know in your head.

On the otherhand, what you know in your head isn't ideal, and if you were to train it, there would be further consequences. What I mean by this, is that playing w/o emotion is not the end goal - the end goal needs to be to play w/o negative emotion. To get to that point you need to resolve the underlying flaws in your logic that create anger/frustration/etc. Being competitive is a great thing - but just swallowing your competitive drive can actually cause motivation probs in the long-run. The problem you run into in poker - being super competitive is that in the short-run, the results don't match skill level. Poker is not, golf, or baseball, or other sports where the skill differential that exists between you and your opponents NEVER results in them winning. Which means, in the short-term you have to compete even more on playing your absolute best. If that translates into winning celebrate - if it doesn't celebrate. Otherwise, you'll drive yourself mad.

Make sense? Help?

Obviously there's a lot more in the book, and if you do get it, check out Hate-losing tilt - right up your alley.

 

[Jared Tendler]

Just watching a clip of you in an interview at WSOP on PokerNews. Cool
http://www.pokernews.com/video/wsop-2011-mental-game-strategy-with-jared-tendler-1062353465001.htm

Thanks!!

 

[NutsHoldem]

Hi Jared!
I'm reading your book and found that it great. Simple concepts formulated in plain English and they work.
At this moment I think my problem is overconfidence. I play on micros in fishy rooms so my opps I mostly bad players. I'm running well under EV and getting many coolers vs regs. It hurts me but not much. I'm still winning player.
When I win 2-3 buyins in the beginning of session or even worst in previous session, I'm falling in the "God mode". How ever I can lose if my opps are so bad? Then I'm starting to make bad moves - bluff 3 barrels with ATC vs calling stations, bad calls on river, and so on. Now I'm just quitting when feel I that I'm started spewing money AGAIN.
What to do with overconfidence?

P/S Just completed quiz on http://tim-richardson.net/misc/estimation_quiz.html Result: "If you get less than six correct, you are very overconfident."
I got 2 correct anwsers

 

[Poker Orifice]

PO - it's a challenge to have your emotions match the logic in your head, but in order to be able to do it, you must first understand why that split even occurs. The basic deal is that emotions/heart require A LOT more proof/evidence/training before they become completely organized around what you know to be true in your head. So on the one hand you simply need to master what you know in your head.

On the otherhand, what you know in your head isn't ideal, and if you were to train it, there would be further consequences. What I mean by this, is that playing w/o emotion is not the end goal - the end goal needs to be to play w/o negative emotion. To get to that point you need to resolve the underlying flaws in your logic that create anger/frustration/etc. Being competitive is a great thing - but just swallowing your competitive drive can actually cause motivation probs in the long-run. The problem you run into in poker - being super competitive is that in the short-run, the results don't match skill level. Poker is not, golf, or baseball, or other sports where the skill differential that exists between you and your opponents NEVER results in them winning. Which means, in the short-term you have to compete even more on playing your absolute best. If that translates into winning celebrate - if it doesn't celebrate. Otherwise, you'll drive yourself mad.

Make sense? Help?
Yes, & thanks for the response.
Obviously there's a lot more in the book, and if you do get it, check out Hate-losing tilt - right up your alley.

I will be getting the book... just a matter of when (it's on the 'wishlist' for others buyin' me gifts... I'm easy to buy for > 'get me a poker book')

 

[Jared Tendler]

Hi Jared!
I'm reading your book and found that it great. Simple concepts formulated in plain English and they work.
At this moment I think my problem is overconfidence. I play on micros in fishy rooms so my opps I mostly bad players. I'm running well under EV and getting many coolers vs regs. It hurts me but not much. I'm still winning player.
When I win 2-3 buyins in the beginning of session or even worst in previous session, I'm falling in the "God mode". How ever I can lose if my opps are so bad? Then I'm starting to make bad moves - bluff 3 barrels with ATC vs calling stations, bad calls on river, and so on. Now I'm just quitting when feel I that I'm started spewing money AGAIN.
What to do with overconfidence?

P/S Just completed quiz on http://tim-richardson.net/misc/estimation_quiz.html Result: "If you get less than six correct, you are very overconfident."
I got 2 correct anwsers

Great to hear you're loving the book!

What to do with overconfidence? Very simply, eliminate the flaws or missing knowledge that creates it. You're basically trying to dial back your confidence and remove the excess layers that create overconfidence. Obviously, study diligently the Chapter 8 on confidence, and the first 4 chapters of the book, so you can create stable confidence.

To help you dig in and find the flaws - talk more about "God mode" - what do you believe is true when you're in that state of mind? Be as honest as possible because what you think at that time helps to identify the flawed beliefs that allow your mind to get into that state to begin with. Post them here and I'll help you work through it.

 

[NutsHoldem]

Great to hear you're loving the book!

What to do with overconfidence? Very simply, eliminate the flaws or missing knowledge that creates it. You're basically trying to dial back your confidence and remove the excess layers that create overconfidence. Obviously, study diligently the Chapter 8 on confidence, and the first 4 chapters of the book, so you can create stable confidence.

To help you dig in and find the flaws - talk more about "God mode" - what do you believe is true when you're in that state of mind? Be as honest as possible because what you think at that time helps to identify the flawed beliefs that allow your mind to get into that state to begin with. Post them here and I'll help you work through it.

Thanks Jared for help
Some of my thoughts are:
1. I believe that dispersion don't have power on me anymore couse my opp are so bad
2. I start to think that I can outplay anybody on table. I start make bad calls, bad bluffs etc. Preflop game don't change much but post-flop dramatically.
3. I' m thinking "I'am up couple of buyins, so I can take a risk and if I lose some - no big deal". The value of money drops.
4. Possibly insight I can't believe that I can be so good or lucky in poker so I try to restore status quo, spewing money

Although I feel on physical level that body received some hormones in blood just after I won 9 buyins in 2 hours.

 

[Jared Tendler]

Thanks Jared for help
Some of my thoughts are:
1. I believe that dispersion don't have power on me anymore couse my opp are so bad
2. I start to think that I can outplay anybody on table. I start make bad calls, bad bluffs etc. Preflop game don't change much but post-flop dramatically.
3. I' m thinking "I'am up couple of buyins, so I can take a risk and if I lose some - no big deal". The value of money drops.
4. Possibly insight I can't believe that I can be so good or lucky in poker so I try to restore status quo, spewing money

Although I feel on physical level that body received some hormones in blood just after I won 9 buyins in 2 hours.

Great insight. Here's what I'd suggest doing now.

Break down each of the four points using the Mental Hand History. Draw on material in chapter 8 to help you break them down, especially step 2: Defining why it's logical you would think or react this way. Then, post one of them, and I'll give you feedback on how well you did.

Sound good?

 

[PotluckXXI]

Ok I played a little online poker and blew my bankroll, so I started reading books (mostly ones recomended on this site) and trying to work on my skills on a play money site. After building up $200k in play money I soon lost it all. I tried to rebuild but I have had so many bad runs that I cannot get my confidence back. I've turned into a tight/weak/passive player.The problem is that on the play money site is that Semi-Bluffing is very hard unless you have the right players, usually there is one or two that will never fold a hand' The second is that even with A's or AK suited no matter how much i bet ppl don't fold and I get drawn out on, and the last is the constant raise reraising before flop, people with very weak hands make it so expensive to stay in that if I stayed in the hand and lost I am down to 1/4 or less of my bank roll and I keep getting drawn out or not making an outside strait on the turn and river. Should I just quit playing the Play Money games because my confidence is destroyed?

 

[Poker Orifice]

Wanted to bump this thread up because I feel it's one of the best on the forum.

The book is coming for Christmas! (so I've been told). I'm easy to shop for... "What poker book(s) do you want this year for Christmas?"

I was reading a thread on another forum (by crashwhips) & saw some references to yourself on there & must say it probably came at around the right time (when I was motivated to do some more reading.... after a particularly bad run over the weekend). I've copied/pasted a quote that is now sitting on my desktop (re: interjecting logic) >
"I recognize that I'm upset that I just took a horrible beat and lost a bunch of money but poker is a game governed in large part by random chance, and getting my money in good in situations like that is how I make my money. If the bad players didn't suck out sometimes they would stop playing the game, so it is silly for me to be angry about this, and even sillier for me to start playing worse because of it." (Jared Tendler)

 

[kevin schaefer]

Hey Jared. Glad we he have some one here with your skills and expirence!
I was very curious on a layout of improving. Since a am taking all of my vaction days (3 weeks) that rolled over from last year, I will have much time to really focus on my game. I do not want to waste this time blindly jumping from article to video to books to tables.
I guess I am asking for some sort of agenda plan and tips for planning a strong poker schedule for someone who wants to review what he knows and advance in new/old aspects of there game. As I said early I will have A LOT of time on my hands.
Thanks Again, Kevin

 

[Jared Tendler]

Wanted to bump this thread up because I feel it's one of the best on the forum.

The book is coming for Christmas! (so I've been told). I'm easy to shop for... "What poker book(s) do you want this year for Christmas?"

I was reading a thread on another forum (by crashwhips) & saw some references to yourself on there & must say it probably came at around the right time (when I was motivated to do some more reading.... after a particularly bad run over the weekend). I've copied/pasted a quote that is now sitting on my desktop (re: interjecting logic) >
"I recognize that I'm upset that I just took a horrible beat and lost a bunch of money but poker is a game governed in large part by random chance, and getting my money in good in situations like that is how I make my money. If the bad players didn't suck out sometimes they would stop playing the game, so it is silly for me to be angry about this, and even sillier for me to start playing worse because of it." (Jared Tendler)

Thanks for the bump PO. I was finishing up some work before I take some time off and realized that I hadn't been here in a while. This is a nice post to return too

Enjoy the book! Look forward to hearing how it helps you.