It happens mate but it doesn’t mean you are a loser. As others mentioned maybe you had a mental breakdown or a Tilt, but this is part of our long term process of achieving self control.
Keep studying and if you really love poker, never give up! I’m much more loser than you are and I tell you to never retreat, never surrender, have faith in your work and the time will bring you joy and success!
Take me as an example, I went to live in the streets, became a beggar, lost friends, family, computer, cell phone, I can’t even play poker now, but I do own a cellphone and I have faith it will work it out for me!
I have absolutely nothing so I’m the big loser. But I’m striving, I see a hard path ahead because I’m nearly 41 years old but I tell you: love yourself and put effort and discipline, and forget about time, let it take it 20, 30 years the most important thing is that you are alive and fighting.
I believe in you, so all you have to do is being to believe in yourself!
All the best regards to you mate and let the chips fall as they may!