The Drunk man at the poker table



We have all played this guy before; some of us occasionally have been this guy. The one who is in every pot catching hand after hand. He is the suckout king and he is wasted. He thinks he is playing great poker but he has been a luckbox. He has been drinking beer, hard liquor, or frozen concoctions all night and it has affected his play. These people can be difficult to match up against because they seem to win every pot they enter. Some players tighten up, some loosen up but either way you know any hand against this guy could be for all your chips.

What do we know about the drunk man, other than he is obnoxious, stubborn and an assclown? For starters we know he is not going to lay down a hand very easily. He will likely call or reraise your bets so don’t try to bluff the obliterated guy. Now don’t get me wrong -- you can bluff the drunk guy but only if you have a good read on him. There is really only one bet that can get the drunk guy to fold; the all-in move. Its not that the drink guy really respects the all-in; he doesn’t, he’s drunk, it’s just that he knows he can’t bluff at the pot anymore. Also he knows if he calls he has to show his crap hand and he will most likely lose. You can almost see his brain start working again when this happens and he realizes; damn I need to fold here. If you pull off a bluff then considering showing it to him because, lets face it there it nothing better than seeing a drunk man on tilt.

Don’t try to do any crazy setup plays against this guy; he’s drunk so he probably won’t remember or even have noticed how you played a hand 10 minutes ago.

Slow play more often against the drunk guy; this really baffles him. He’s betting the entire hand then when you check raise him on the river he has to look at his cards. He’s not looking to verify what he has; he’s looking because he forgot what they were; he’s hammered.

Let him make the all-in move. Many drunks think the all-in is this great move that they can use to get someone off a hand. They always see the reraise or the all-in as their “big move.” Well let them make the big move. If you have a great hand never bet more than 1/3 of your stack. You still have enough chips that the drink man will think he can force you off the hand. The firstthought that goes through the drunk guys mind is “if I go all-in he will fold”. As with most drunks there is not much thinking after that initial thought. Plus it is much more satisfying to be calling an all-in with the nuts.

So are you up to the challenge, if you would like to play against the drunk man, or even if you want to be the drunk man we can help. A frozen margarita machine rental from MoJo Margaritas at your next poker event will insure a drunk at the table. If you are lucky that man may be you, if not you now know how to beat him.
Jack Daniels

Jack Daniels

Charcoal Mellowed
I'm not as much under the alcofluence of incohol as some thinkle peep I am. Wow, the drunker I stand here, the longer I get. I've only had tee martoonies.


Rock Star
Is shortstacked a woman?...because that thread feels like it is written by my wife. just leave us drunk men alone as we dont usually get much chance to sit by our precious computers and have a wee drink at the same time. Drunk men playing poker at the weekends are a tradition ..not a disease....Anyone that plays poker at the weekend for work purposes as opposed to pleasure and fun have no life:beer:


Well well don't blame us women for this, I'm sure this was not written by any of us gals...