Why does it hurt you to lose

I was just curious on why it hurts you guys to lose in poker? Is it the money? Is it for pride? Maybe it's because you just hate to lose. Or maybe losing, even the smallest pot, kinda kills that dream of being a wsop bracelet winner just a little bit everytime. For me it's purely competitive. I wanna prove I'm better than every single person not only across from me but on pretty much any website or casino I play at, and when I lose it's like saying there better than me. Money could matter less to me, I just wanna be the best. Just curious on why a lot of people on this site hate losing.

ok i dont mind losing if its agains a better hand or say kk vs aa because they had a hand.but when i lose to idiots that push with crap and win just ridiculous.i am the same the money isnt important just nice to win money tho hehe.as you im competitive and love playing my (a) game

It is human nature to not like losing. Overall, that is why people hate it when it happens.

On to you... If you are getting that upset when someone steals the blinds from you, maybe you should re-evaluate, lol. You can't win every pot and you won't win every pot, or even half the pots, or a 1/4 of the pots that you play in. As much as poker is a game of skill there is still the luck of the draw thrown in there as well(I mean that's the only explanation for Jamie Gold winning the WSOP). If you want to be better(not the best, that is a very very long way off), you have to put in hard work. Read books and forums, go over those losing and winning hands and see what you did wrong or what you could do better, log a lot of time playing. There may be some rocky roads, but you will get better if you really put your mind into it.

Uhm, this isn't really about me getting upset over every single pot. I know I can't win them all I just kinda wanted to know what drives everyone to not want to lose the most. It's obvious I'm not the best be to be the best is what drives me.

I do get upset about every single pot, I don't mind if they're stealing my blinds that's acceptable just do it unexploitably because I respect good blind stealing but if you do it badly I don't like you and I'm looking for any chance I can get to take your money.
Don't raise me at any time because I take personal offence to it, even if you've got aces you should 3bet/fold because even though I've got 57s my 4bet was correct so the pot should be MINE.
And whatever you do, do NOT fold to me when I've got a big hand because the whole table knows I'm a fish, I do have the nuts but my range is like 2% nuts and 98% middle pair or less so you should be value betting your rags and to fold them is at least unfair if not cheating, you're supposed to pay me off.




As for why winning/losing actually matters, I don't know. I don't think it's the dollars, I've played pots that were 2x my week's living expenses before and still think in BB, even after a big losing streak it's not "omg, I lost the farm!" it's "man... that hurt my bankroll".

I don't think it's necessarily pride either, provided that you've been winning reasonably at your current stakes then you're nowhere near being outclassed, ever. I think I've played at one, maybe two tables where I've been outclassed since I started winning consistently. Simply because to just break even you have to significantly outplay your opponents to beat the rake, your edge is huge, losing is just rake and variance, you probably are outplaying your opponents. With that being said, I think the uncertainty of how good you actually are plays a role. Even if you're crushing for a huge winrate when you take a downswing it's only healthy to ask "was winning just luck?" "have I forgotten/changed something that made me a winner, can I get it back?"

For me I have to say it's the money I hate to lose money. If it's to a better hand ok but bad beats I can't handle that,pride doesn't matter to me much and if i'm winning money then i'm better than the guys i'm play against.

Often it's because they suck out on me. I really want to build my bankroll and player higher stakes, so these suck outs hurt in that aspect.

i like to play for the money, but when i lose i dont get mad because i lost money. i more get mad at myself because i usually make a really bad decision or two which cost me the money in the first place.

I used to hate it and it would tilt me quite easily, but the more hands I play the more I see it evening out over time. Now I just look whether I got my money in good or not and whether or not it was a good play.

I dislike losing because given the choice, obviously you'd win every time. But I don't hate it per se. What I hate is making mistakes, whether I win or lose after them.

Have you noticed that when some one wants to loose they have a harder time loosing in most cases, or when you quit trying in some cases you start doing better. I think we hate loosing because once we sit down, winning is the goal and we put a lot of pressure on our selves as well as money or time etc. I think if you put less importance on winning and maybe the quality of play that you bring or just enjoyment of playing you will take the losses a lot easier because we all know that no matter what you will be see bad beats.

Good Question

When I tried to answer the question, I had a difficult time putting it into words. I guess I wasn't really sure what it was.

A previous statement by budebuzz summed it pretty well for me.

"I think we hate loosing because once we sit down, winning is the goal and we put a lot of pressure on ourselves"

I think its both good and bad to put a lot of pressure on yourself. Good because it drives you to be a better player. Bad, because you can become intolerant of losing and other players. Worst than losing, I would really hate taking loses personally, and become a bad loser.

Thanks for the opportunity to consider the question and answer.

come on man.....we hate to lose because the object of any game is to win!Don't get me wrong ....there is a way to lose with sportsmanship and well....that other way is often an option for to many of us.Just the same you play the game to win...compete to do your best otherwise whats the point?

I hate to lose and on top of that if there is money involved I hate ten times more. Sometimes if i lose and it was a fair lose I' m not as mad but if I get beat on a bad beat especially on the river thats when i get pissed.

There are two ways that I don't mind losing. When I got all the chips in the middle as the favourite and lost because villain got lucky and two, I got my chips in as an underdog and didn't catch up.

One hand, one tournament, one session do not determine who is the best player. The best players win the most money over a long period of time. The sooner players realize that, the bad beats are easier to take and the less time and money you will waste on tilt.

What I personally detest are mistakes that I make. Especially one's that I knew better and still made any way.

Numbuh 0ne said:

I was just curious on why it hurts you guys to lose in poker?

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I'm a really competitive person with everything. No one likes losing, everyone wants to win and feel empowered by a good run that we always wish would last forever.

Numbuh 0ne said:

Is it the money?

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Not really, money is just a way to keep score.

Numbuh 0ne said:

Is it for pride?

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Going with the competitive aspect of the game, yes.

Numbuh 0ne said:

I wanna prove I'm better than every single person not only across from me but on pretty much any website or casino I play at, and when I lose it's like saying there better than me. Money could matter less to me, I just wanna be the best. Just curious on why a lot of people on this site hate losing.

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I believe all of us feel this way. Except the guys who play for a living at that point it really does matter about the money.

I play for the money, i play for my treeeeesss

simply put, the more money i make per hour the happier i am, losing pots often is fine and super standard, as long an my hourly rate stays nice and the green is rolling in im very pleased :canabis::canabis::canabis::canabis::canabis:

absoluthamm said:

It is human nature to not like losing. Overall, that is why people hate it when it happens.

On to you... If you are getting that upset when someone steals the blinds from you, maybe you should re-evaluate, lol. You can't win every pot and you won't win every pot, or even half the pots, or a 1/4 of the pots that you play in. As much as poker is a game of skill there is still the luck of the draw thrown in there as well(I mean that's the only explanation for Jamie Gold winning the WSOP). If you want to be better(not the best, that is a very very long way off), you have to put in hard work. Read books and forums, go over those losing and winning hands and see what you did wrong or what you could do better, log a lot of time playing. There may be some rocky roads, but you will get better if you really put your mind into it.

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^^^^ This, i wait till i get a hand then shove over them..

It also has to do with the amount of time we put in to just one MTT..

its human nature to want to win so obv its upsetting when we lose