L
LukeSilver
Rock Star
Silver Level
I have managed to reach a point which many on here wish to reach. I am probably far from the best poker player on these forums and I am sure we have quite a few members here who have made/do make a lot more from the game then me. However I have reached a point where I am able to make a reasonably comfortable living from online poker.
I have however faced considerable stress over the recent periods related to poker and find it is very difficult to find people who i can talk to properly about this.
So one thing which becomes highly relevant to all this is I am in fact Autistic. This was behind a lot of my motivation in poker. You see the working world is highly political on multiple occasions I have seen people who are very good at their jobs been forced out due to work place politics because other people want their job or want a promotion over them or feel threatened. I have seen a good friend of mine break down in tears due to this on multiple occasions they ended up working 12 hour plus days just to try and hold on to a job they were eventually forced out of and cant get a reference.
on top of this I find that people have expectations on where people belong in life and if someone exceeds those expectations people will actively try to sabotage them even when no merit to themselves.
What I am about to say is going to be very controversial and I am sure some people will disagree me with passionately. Society on the whole believes people who have Autism to be retarded. if they thought any different autism would not be defined as a profound life long mental handicap. Due to insecurities I had my IQ professionally tested it comes out as 130 or 144 depending on what scale you use but basically I missed mensa by one point (which really annoyed me). In all work places I have worked at I have been bullied and sabotaged if I want to work for minimum wage and get bullied the rest of my life and put down and struggle to pay the bills I can and will always have work but what sort of life is that?
When I mentioned online poker to some people out and about and proved I was making money from it I got one story about a guy who was making a decent living from fruit machines The lady that told me this long story and went into detail about him counting and bagging all the pound coins with his girlfriend. basically she wanted me to get addicted to fruit machines and busto myself wonderful person. note this was made up nonsense do not try and make a living from fruit machines you cannot do this. I had another girl who made up knowing a guy that worked for playtech and apparently the whole thing was rigged and she even went into great detail about how he would draw silly pictures on the cards etc. if you know much about computing and I dont know a lot you would know that is nonsense.
When I worked in sales somehow I was managing for a brief period to out perform the average despite been autistic. I think that was the upside of variance, However people actively sabotaged me in multiple ways one way was sneaking a wireless mouse connection to my computer and scrolling the data so I lost the details of who i was talking to.
This is where poker comes in it is one of the few places people should not be able to hurt me. If someone wants to come after me in heads up hypers one of two scenarios is realistic, either
1. they are not better then me in which case they just end up giving me money
2. they are better then me but if so they could be playing higher stake games and making more money elsewhere so they are lowering their hourly income by playing me.
either way one way or another it will cost them money.
If someone wants to target me in cash games or tournaments well that is the object of the game if you can out play anyone on the table you do and you find any exploit and use it. If I am good enough to be at the table no one can stop me, I mean a very good player could come at me in cash games if I played cash games (I don't) but it would be opportunity cost they cant target me in mtts as unlikely they hit my table.
If I am good enough in poker I can make a very good wage and no one could ruin it for me, no matter how good I am in the working world people can sabotage me and ruin it for me. I currently make approx £100 a night give or take a little either side as hard to get exact figure as you need very large sample size for that. I can see with hard work and further study I could get that figure to £200/£300 so based on five days a week I can currently make £500 a week or £25000 a year or if I improve that could get to £1000/£1500 a week which is £50000/£75000 a year this is based on standard working week time commitment and allowing for time off for occasions.
This is tax free income in the UK they do not tax. So why would i be stressed I mean poker looks like a no brainer choice here. In order to make the same money after tax then what I currently do I would need to earn £33,242.54 from a day job in order to make the equivelent of £50000/£75000 after tax I would need to make £80,839.39/£142,071.22. Note i know the figures seem odd just bare in mind as you earn more in the uk you get taxed more. I doubt I will ever get a job that pays over 25k pre tax let alone 33k let alone 80k+
So why the stress well the UK gambling law constantly threatens the viability of poker as an income over here, So far it looks like there is not much threat. However it is a constant stress not knowing what they will do, and if that will affect me badly. Also been classed as autistic I could be classed as a vulnerable customer this could affect me negatively too.
Further with gamstop anyone who had enough details on me could register me just to sabotage me based on past experience this really is not far fetched. I feel like I need to keep my poker a secret from everyone i can right now. My family dont approve of my poker and feel I should have a full time normal job why to work for close to min wage and struggle to pay the bills. I also worry that my family could register my details with gamstop.
I know your not supposed to but how could gamstop tell the difference between me registering myself or someone else registering my details and how could I appeal that or would I just be screwed.
I feel that I need to make quite a bit of money so I have the option to up and move to another country if need be.
I dont feel like I can talk to many people about this anxiety, I mean straight away people go to you have a gambling problem, how I consistently make money, and it appears to offer me more potential then anything else. I never gamble what I cant afford I stick to strict bankroll management rules and manage this as a profession.
Just society doesnt see it that way and people cant think for themselves for the most part they just go with what they are told by the media.
I have however faced considerable stress over the recent periods related to poker and find it is very difficult to find people who i can talk to properly about this.
So one thing which becomes highly relevant to all this is I am in fact Autistic. This was behind a lot of my motivation in poker. You see the working world is highly political on multiple occasions I have seen people who are very good at their jobs been forced out due to work place politics because other people want their job or want a promotion over them or feel threatened. I have seen a good friend of mine break down in tears due to this on multiple occasions they ended up working 12 hour plus days just to try and hold on to a job they were eventually forced out of and cant get a reference.
on top of this I find that people have expectations on where people belong in life and if someone exceeds those expectations people will actively try to sabotage them even when no merit to themselves.
What I am about to say is going to be very controversial and I am sure some people will disagree me with passionately. Society on the whole believes people who have Autism to be retarded. if they thought any different autism would not be defined as a profound life long mental handicap. Due to insecurities I had my IQ professionally tested it comes out as 130 or 144 depending on what scale you use but basically I missed mensa by one point (which really annoyed me). In all work places I have worked at I have been bullied and sabotaged if I want to work for minimum wage and get bullied the rest of my life and put down and struggle to pay the bills I can and will always have work but what sort of life is that?
When I mentioned online poker to some people out and about and proved I was making money from it I got one story about a guy who was making a decent living from fruit machines The lady that told me this long story and went into detail about him counting and bagging all the pound coins with his girlfriend. basically she wanted me to get addicted to fruit machines and busto myself wonderful person. note this was made up nonsense do not try and make a living from fruit machines you cannot do this. I had another girl who made up knowing a guy that worked for playtech and apparently the whole thing was rigged and she even went into great detail about how he would draw silly pictures on the cards etc. if you know much about computing and I dont know a lot you would know that is nonsense.
When I worked in sales somehow I was managing for a brief period to out perform the average despite been autistic. I think that was the upside of variance, However people actively sabotaged me in multiple ways one way was sneaking a wireless mouse connection to my computer and scrolling the data so I lost the details of who i was talking to.
This is where poker comes in it is one of the few places people should not be able to hurt me. If someone wants to come after me in heads up hypers one of two scenarios is realistic, either
1. they are not better then me in which case they just end up giving me money
2. they are better then me but if so they could be playing higher stake games and making more money elsewhere so they are lowering their hourly income by playing me.
either way one way or another it will cost them money.
If someone wants to target me in cash games or tournaments well that is the object of the game if you can out play anyone on the table you do and you find any exploit and use it. If I am good enough to be at the table no one can stop me, I mean a very good player could come at me in cash games if I played cash games (I don't) but it would be opportunity cost they cant target me in mtts as unlikely they hit my table.
If I am good enough in poker I can make a very good wage and no one could ruin it for me, no matter how good I am in the working world people can sabotage me and ruin it for me. I currently make approx £100 a night give or take a little either side as hard to get exact figure as you need very large sample size for that. I can see with hard work and further study I could get that figure to £200/£300 so based on five days a week I can currently make £500 a week or £25000 a year or if I improve that could get to £1000/£1500 a week which is £50000/£75000 a year this is based on standard working week time commitment and allowing for time off for occasions.
This is tax free income in the UK they do not tax. So why would i be stressed I mean poker looks like a no brainer choice here. In order to make the same money after tax then what I currently do I would need to earn £33,242.54 from a day job in order to make the equivelent of £50000/£75000 after tax I would need to make £80,839.39/£142,071.22. Note i know the figures seem odd just bare in mind as you earn more in the uk you get taxed more. I doubt I will ever get a job that pays over 25k pre tax let alone 33k let alone 80k+
So why the stress well the UK gambling law constantly threatens the viability of poker as an income over here, So far it looks like there is not much threat. However it is a constant stress not knowing what they will do, and if that will affect me badly. Also been classed as autistic I could be classed as a vulnerable customer this could affect me negatively too.
Further with gamstop anyone who had enough details on me could register me just to sabotage me based on past experience this really is not far fetched. I feel like I need to keep my poker a secret from everyone i can right now. My family dont approve of my poker and feel I should have a full time normal job why to work for close to min wage and struggle to pay the bills. I also worry that my family could register my details with gamstop.
I know your not supposed to but how could gamstop tell the difference between me registering myself or someone else registering my details and how could I appeal that or would I just be screwed.
I feel that I need to make quite a bit of money so I have the option to up and move to another country if need be.
I dont feel like I can talk to many people about this anxiety, I mean straight away people go to you have a gambling problem, how I consistently make money, and it appears to offer me more potential then anything else. I never gamble what I cant afford I stick to strict bankroll management rules and manage this as a profession.
Just society doesnt see it that way and people cant think for themselves for the most part they just go with what they are told by the media.
