J
JNH387
Rising Star
Bronze Level
Hello all, I'm new to the forums but have been grinding freerolls lately on ACR and thought I would post my progress (if any). A little about me (sorry for the long read), I started playing poker online at party poker then Absolute Poker then poker stars when I was under age around 16-17. I had no prior experience with texas holdem and found the game very interesting and fun. I played play money for probably 6 months to a year idk. Not sure on the exact timing of things it's been a long time since I thought about these things in detail, but long story short, I eventually convinced my mom to "bankroll" me $50 with her debit card on pokerstars and off I went. I ran that $50 up to around $1000 playing tight aggressive poker. I loved the .50-1NL and $2-4NL tables. Eventually I suffered what I would call total burn out. I hadn't hit a bad run of cards, I hadn't started tilting...no I was just bored....a bored ignorant kid. The only way I can explain it, it was like a kid who felt he had conquered his newest game/toy and needed something new to keep him interested....but not in an arrogant way...just in a natural way. Of course Poker can never truly be conquered but that's how I felt and I couldn't shake it. So without proper preparation, bankroll planning, nor having a thought about "variance" and certainly no clue on how to walk away when not interested...I hit the wall and crashed....and then panic set in. Determined to continue playing and to figure out how to solve my motivation dilemma, I began playing different games, sngs, small buyin tournaments and higher limit cash games even sitting at 5-10NL which I had no business doing. Nothing I did seemed to solve my problem of motivation and I lacked the mental maturity and strength to deal with losing...so I eventually ran it all down to $0. I stopped playing entirely.
Some years later in my mid 20s I deposited on carbonpoker maybe $20 or $50...but ran into the same problem...it wasn't the game, the cards or the players...it was my utter lack of focus and love of the game. I only played a two sessions and I figured that would be the last time I would ever play cards online.
Today at age 30 I feel a lot different, physically, mentally, spiritually than I have at any other time in my life. I have found myself noticing details about everyday life that I could never see before. It's difficult to explain. Even with movies I had seen more that once when I was younger, I find my self wanting to watch them over again to see them with my "new eyes". I have a calm and a peace I can't explain, it's like being born again as they say. God is good. I really feel like I have what it takes to play poker and do well at it - at least mentally.
Anyway, I have been grinding ARC freerolls to test my new "feeling" and see if I have the patience to be a winning poker player. Motivation, patience, tilt and focus are my biggest obstacles and if I can't control those...no sense in learning or trying to go any further.
Short term goal is to 3 table the basement .01-.02 NL with a starting bank of $114-150. (I have bit coin waiting...but I have been holding off deposit while I play freerolls.)
Long term goal is to 3 table .50-1 NL with proper bankroll.
Below are my freeroll results to date. I've never been a MTT player but I feel I'm doing ok. These are not "censored" results meaning occasionally I'm registered for the next freeroll and find after finishing the prior freeroll I'm too tired to finish the next one...thus quick "all in" retirement finish.
Current winnings: $1.85
All these have generally 500-800 players, top 10 makes money.
159
475
328
158
234
82
41
42
30
34
411
492
125
391
59
187
46
66
110
106
583
6
95
397
382
137
49
3
206
321
312
102
70
126
339
376
351
Would like to post some hands but ARC tracking isn't working right? Idk.
Thanks for reading and I hope to be an active member of CardChat!
Some years later in my mid 20s I deposited on carbonpoker maybe $20 or $50...but ran into the same problem...it wasn't the game, the cards or the players...it was my utter lack of focus and love of the game. I only played a two sessions and I figured that would be the last time I would ever play cards online.
Today at age 30 I feel a lot different, physically, mentally, spiritually than I have at any other time in my life. I have found myself noticing details about everyday life that I could never see before. It's difficult to explain. Even with movies I had seen more that once when I was younger, I find my self wanting to watch them over again to see them with my "new eyes". I have a calm and a peace I can't explain, it's like being born again as they say. God is good. I really feel like I have what it takes to play poker and do well at it - at least mentally.
Anyway, I have been grinding ARC freerolls to test my new "feeling" and see if I have the patience to be a winning poker player. Motivation, patience, tilt and focus are my biggest obstacles and if I can't control those...no sense in learning or trying to go any further.
Short term goal is to 3 table the basement .01-.02 NL with a starting bank of $114-150. (I have bit coin waiting...but I have been holding off deposit while I play freerolls.)
Long term goal is to 3 table .50-1 NL with proper bankroll.
Below are my freeroll results to date. I've never been a MTT player but I feel I'm doing ok. These are not "censored" results meaning occasionally I'm registered for the next freeroll and find after finishing the prior freeroll I'm too tired to finish the next one...thus quick "all in" retirement finish.
Current winnings: $1.85
All these have generally 500-800 players, top 10 makes money.
159
475
328
158
234
82
41
42
30
34
411
492
125
391
59
187
46
66
110
106
583
6
95
397
382
137
49
3
206
321
312
102
70
126
339
376
351
Would like to post some hands but ARC tracking isn't working right? Idk.
Thanks for reading and I hope to be an active member of CardChat!