Tilt: Didn't see that one coming.

I used to have horrid tilt. Like "punch the wall or computer monitor" horrid. Over the years (and with the help of strong psychiatric medications), I have gotten to the point where I can honestly and truly say that bad beats rarely cause me any emotional reactions. It's not that the anger is there and I control it and get over it, it's just not there to begin with. However, I've still been seeing the effects of tilt without the emotional aspect. What I mean by that is I have 100BB and my AA loses 60BB to 83o. My reaction is, "Ah, crap. That sucked. Oh well." And I move on. Except, 10 hands later I'm felted and literally asking myself, why would I play those last 10 hands like that? That was horrid.
This has happened to me consistently over the course of the past year or two (since I got on these happy pills), but I didn't realize it until recently that I was still having the full-on experience of tilt even without the negative emotions.
So, I spent a couple months trying to figure out what was going on and I've come to a realization. Classic Tilt isn't just emotional and, it isn't just that emotions alter your ability to play well. When you strip out the anger aspect you still have a "desperation" aspect and that is what was always biting me in the ass. When you lose a huge chunk of chips, especially when blinds are high, not only is there anger, but there is this sense of desperation. This sense of, "Oh my God I have to get my chips back NOW!" What I came to realize is when I have super bad beats and don't get angry, I am still having feelings of desperation. Almost frantic feelings where I'm looking for some kind of angle on every hand to try to take down every pot instead of waiting for the spots I would normally play (which happen to be a lot normally). Looseness and aggression go up to get the chips back, but there's also this aspect of folding and passiveness going up to preserve the chips I have left at the exact same time. How is that possible? One hand you're bluffing when you shouldn't, the next you're folding to a C-bet when you've got mid pair with decent draws. However it happens, if you're not getting angry but still spewing chips you've gotta ask yourself why. And I bet you'll find that you are feeling desperate to get those chips back.
Or, perhaps there are people who have the opposite problem. Maybe your problem is you hit a bad beat, get angry and then get overly cautious to where you shut down and simply aren't looking for opportunities. I don't know, I guess that's just as possible.

Either way, the next time you have a bad beat really think about your mental state and not just your emotional state and maybe you can find a way to overcome both aspects of tilt.

bad beats rarely cause me any emotional reactions.. thx

Thanks for sharing your experience with bad beats, emotional suck-outs; stuff that weighs on one as a player and as a person.
To sum up, if we all keep perspective, the better off we will be. You made a lot of valid points, poker, emotions, viewpoints. Others, add to this thread, your perspective.

I hate to be the bearer of bad news but there will come a day when those pills stop working. You'll quickly realize how dependent your emotional state and just overall mindset was on the pills.
I went through a similar experience, minus the extreme rage, and the withdrawal symptoms were far worse than how I was before getting on it.
I'm no hippie but I can assure that meditation, just a couple minutes each day, is much better long term. At first it actually feels like work, and feels like it's not worth it but after a week or two, you'll notice the difference. Whenever I get a bad beat, it's the same reaction as yours now, 'oh well, couldn't do much there', and I just move on to the next hand/game.

I have been playing poker for 9 years and during that time I learned to control my emotions. The secret is very simple, I always play the money that I can afford to spend.