Most disheartening type of loss
If there's a trend to how my losing days go, it's this.
I still cannot go mentally unaffected by a string of bad beats. (e.g. AK vs. KJ suited. I hit A he hits flush draw. All in and I lose; or I have KK, he has TJos, he flops a J and shoves, then lands another J on the river.)
After losing 3 (3 is usually the magic number for me) in a row like that, I get extremely paranoid. I feel like I am always gonna lose no matter what. So I either quit for the day, or there's no way I will play even halfway decent.
For example, after losing a few consecutive all ins to suckouts, I am afraid to bet like I should. Let's say I make top pair on the flop and I bet. Villain calls and when the 3rd same-suit card hits on the turn and he checks, I am afraid to bet again. Then the 4th same-suit card hits and he checks again, I have to check, and I find out he made his flush with 55 in his hand even though if I bet strongly on the turn he would probably fold. I assume that he made his flush on the turn when he didn't make it until the river and I lose at showdown.
If I am running good or running normally (i.e. occasional suckouts but along reasonably rates - less than 75%) I would bet the turn, but when playing defeated, I don't have the guts to and I fold to almost all aggression.
I just cannot clear that mental hurdle. Rationally I understand that each hand SHOULD be mutually independent, but in reality I cannot play them as they were during bad runs.
Anyone else have this mental block?