You Know Online Poker is Rigged When...

*THIS IS A JOKE TOPIC/THREAD*

You Know Online Poker is Rigged When...

...When you are dealt AA, everyone else is dealt rags. But when you are dealt KK, someone else has been dealt AA.

...The more outs you have on the river, the least likely you'll hit it. But the less outs your opponent has at the river, the more likely they'll hit it.

...You're constantly having to fold rags at a hyper aggressive table, but as soon as you get AA, KK, AK, or a big hand in the BB, thats then table decides to become passive and they all fold to you.

So true though :S

...the flop has five cards

I lose a hand that I did NOT have a 100% chance to win.

OzExorcist said:

...the flop has five cards

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Best one so far

%'m not feeling very witty at the moment, so I'll think of one later.

...I only win half of my coinflips,I only win while drunk,and my aces only holdup 80% of the time.

whats with ur pic?, cant tell u how many times this week that my kk has been killed by aa, was an abnormal amount 4sure, i hate aa grrrrr

lilybo said:

whats with ur pic?, cant tell u how many times this week that my kk has been killed by aa, was an abnormal amount 4sure, i hate aa grrrrr

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I've had my aces cracked by kings the last 2 times i was all in preflop.Lost $80 because of it.The first time the K came on the river.The second the king came on the turn,and then the river again(quads).

I still love aces the best,just happens to be the best starting hand in holdem.Guess I just keep in mind that they will win 80% of all my hands vs. one player.

BTW,it's rigged because I'm not rich yet,and i know I'm good:smile::smile::smile:.

When I read about it on Cardschat.

When a guy posts a bad beat thread that's not actually a bad beat.

When someone goes all in or bets hard with a high pp after the flop. Then starts calling you names or how the hell can you play with that crap? Not understanding they're playing Omaha.

...when some guy with 2 posts makes a thread on an internet forum about how online poker is rigged with zero evidence to support his 'theory'.

outs on the river?

are you denying that poker is obv rigged when the dealer starts dealing out 6th street cards?

beanaddict said:

When someone goes all in or bets hard with a high pp after the flop. Then starts calling you names or how the hell can you play with that crap? Not understanding they're playing Omaha.

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When someone goes all in or bets hard with a full house. Then starts calling you names or how the hell can you play with that crap? Not understanding they're playing Razz.

pigpen02 said:

When someone goes all in or bets hard with a full house. Then starts calling you names or how the hell can you play with that crap? Not understanding they're playing Razz.

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LMAO, yeah I've also seen that one

When you have hordes of 'rake-pimp' affiliates trying to convince you that its not....

You know you're in a rigged game when ...

...you go all-in every hand using the wife as colateral but still end up going home with her.

...you're playing strip poker and you end the evening having sex with yourself.

...when you finish second in a team event to the Morse Code Society.

I've got a few more but I'll probably use them in my poker diary (see other thread).

Snowman

XXX

...when you are a losing player and need to blame something besides yourself.

and the winner is....

OzExorcist said:

...the flop has five cards

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it happend so fast i don't know what was going on, so i just checked.

I'm surprised I haven't seen this one yet:

You're playing on Absolute and this Pottripper guy is taking down every damn hand...

aliengenius said:

...when you are a losing player and need to blame something besides yourself.

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This is my favorite answer. Pretty much has all the evidence and reasoning...

whenever you lose any hand.

when you fold 2-7 14 hands in a row

When you know you are a much better player than Irexes - and he wins loads of money playing and you always lose.