Originally Posted by Dayne G.
When I first started playing seriously, I struggled with this question:
SHOULD IT BE IMPORTANT TO BE LIKED AT THE TABLE- TO BE THOUGHT OF AS A "FRIEND?"
Everyone enjoys being liked, but I now believe it can often get in the way of your bottom line.
One way "needing to be liked" may hurt our overall game is in the way we bet our hands...
Ex: not making a specific play, because it may "upset a friend." I used to feel bad when extracting every last bit of value out of a hand, when against a friend. Sometimes, I would actually soft-play.
Most importantly, though, "needing" friends at the table may make us think in terms of what they would think if we thought X, and made X play. In other words, taking us OUT OF OUR MIND, and OUR thought process... and putting us in THEIR way of thinking.
Needing to be liked, IMO, has no place at the poker table. Talk a lot, ask about wife and kids, girlfriends, etc AWAY from table. No one has to like you...
BUT THEY MUST FEAR YOU... THEY MUST NOT HAVE A CLUE AS TO WHAT YOU'RE FEELING/THINKING...
That's all. Watcha think?
Ya know what, I never gave it much thought. I like to be liked, sure, but certainly don't need
to be at a table. I have real live friends, family who love me - not total strangers. That said, it is my nature to kibbutz around, ENJOY
people and extract the most fun out of any situation. Are you really in a freeroll to spend 4 hours to make $5? I could do something not totally
objectionable, like bag groceries and make $40 in that time.
But even in a medium stakes game, I think being liked can only help you - unless
you change your own way of play. Must admit, I'm reluctant to take out someone I like, especially if they're the only one in that hand w/me. So yes, that affects the way I play. On the flip side, if someone likes you, they may also be reluctant to do the same - if not, no hard feelings - but I can live with myself better. Most people at any table are not
overly friendly. But the ones that I have
gotten friendly with will find out fast that I'm not joking when it comes to pushing my hand around, and realize that they are not they only one in that hand with me.
As stu_ungar said (if he wasn't kidding), it is a deep topic. Good thread.
P.S. Won't hesitate to do a 180 on the donks & all-inners. They can be your bread & butter, especially when they're pissed at you for mouthing off to them. I think it even helps that they know/think you're a women in these situations (also a deep topic).