Poker Quotes!

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pokervike

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Hey everybody I wanted to get in a spot to introduce myself better to the CC community and have some fun getting to know everybody. I like one liners anecdotes and ancient proverbs relating to poker so I thought I'd share one of mine then hope to read miles of everybody else's.

when comparing poker to gambling I argue;

"poker isn't much different than the stock market, we find trends for investment therefore not gambling"

My poker friend said;
"your wrong, when poker goes bad you can stop playing, when the stock market goes bad we're all stuck cleaning up other peoples gambling"
 
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SenorMath

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We can think of way funnier quotes, can't we?

bluffing in poker is like convincing your girlfriend you don't watch porn.
Pocket Rockets feel like i'm so high that I touch the moon.
Money isn't all that matters, unless you are in an unlimited rebuy tournament

I'm sure you guys can come up with some more
 
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pokervike

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"Poker variations are like beer, one is fine unless you have six, then I'll have six"

Can't remember who said that but I know your right. There are piles of good ones!
 
timfbmx

timfbmx

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"If it wasn't for luck id win them all" Phil H.

"To you this is is game, to me this is my life" Phil H.
 
YourHuckleberry

YourHuckleberry

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Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. - Steven Wright

Last year people won more than one billion dollars playing poker. And casinos made twenty-seven billion just by being around those people. - Samantha Bee

Both poker and investing are games of incomplete information. You have a certain set of facts and you are looking for situations where you have an edge, whether the edge is psychological or statistical. - David Einhorn
 
YourHuckleberry

YourHuckleberry

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The guy who invented poker was bright, but the guy who invented the chip was a genius. ~Julius "Big Julie" Weintraub

[Poker] exemplifies the worst aspects of capitalism that have made our country so great. ~Walter Matthau

Baseball is like a poker game. Nobody wants to quit when he's losing; nobody wants you to quit when you're ahead. ~Jackie Robinson
 
YourHuckleberry

YourHuckleberry

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Poker is a microcosm of all we admire and disdain about capitalism and democracy. It can be rough-hewn or polished, warm or cold, charitable and caring, or hard and impersonal, fickle and elusive, but ultimately it is fair, and right, and just. ~Lou Krieger

Most of the money you'll win at poker comes not from the brilliance of your own play, but from the ineptitude of your opponents. ~Lou Krieger

In the poker game of life, women are the rake man. They are the ****in' rake. -Worm
 
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YourHuckleberry

YourHuckleberry

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Limit poker is a science, but no-limit is an art. In limit, you are shooting at a target. In no-limit, the target comes alive and shoots back at you. -Jack Strauss

Life is like a game of cards. The hand that is dealt you is determinism; the way you play it is free will. -Jawaharlal Nehru

At gambling, the deadly sin is to mistake bad play for bad luck. (Ian Fleming Casino Royale – 1953)
 
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pokervike

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Huck, HA! TY!

Who you get involved with in a hand of poker says a lot about how good YOU think you are. Who decides to get into a hand with you, say a lot about how good THEY think you are.
 
BearPlay

BearPlay

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Hey Kev!

Great to (finally) have you over here! It only took me two years to convince Shel to come over, and about a year for you. Maybe my next friend will ease over in six months hehe.

This has always been one of my favorite poker quotes:

"I think one of the interesting things about poker is that once you let your ego in, you're done for."

(Al Alvarez)


Great to see you here (finally) hehe!

Holler if you need anything at all!

B
 
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pokervike

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Hey Kev!

Great to (finally) have you over here! It only took me two years to convince Shel to come over, and about a year for you. Maybe my next friend will ease over in six months hehe.

This has always been one of my favorite poker quotes:

"I think one of the interesting things about poker is that once you let your ego in, you're done for."

(Al Alvarez)


Great to see you here (finally) hehe!

Holler if you need anything at all!

B

"You can always fold your clothes and you can always fold your hand but don't think for a moment you can always fold a friend ;) " happy to be here Bear. Ty Again
 
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freestocks

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It's not gambling. It's just one of the only jobs you can have a negative pay check.
 
akyurukov

akyurukov

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Here one i think is nice.
"Poker is war.People pretend it is a game." - Doyle Brunson
 
starting_at_the_bottom

starting_at_the_bottom

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Not a funny quote, but one I read before every session


WHY WE WIN: THANKS FOR ALL THE FISH


The goal is to make fewer mistakes than your opponent. If you make fewer mistakes, you win by default.

The only time this isn't true is when some inherent luck is involved, as it is in poker. Bad play in poker can win, but only in the short term. The Fundamental Theorem of Poker as presented by David Sklansky is as follows:

The players - herein referred to as fish - at the micro limits make mistakes almost every time they're given the choice to do something. As long as you play solid fundamental poker, they hang themselves. There's no need to be fancy whatsoever. All you do is keep making the right choices (like betting when you flop trips) based on the situation and they'll continue to make the wrong choices (like call a 3/4 pot turn bet hoping for 4 outs).

In fact the fish only have one advantage over you: they're unpredictable. Most of their actions have no logic behind them and you will often be stupefied by what they do. You can't outplay someone if they aren't playing the same game you are. Thus the only option you have is to play solid fundamental poker and be patient. Eventually you win, and they lose.
 
ccocco

ccocco

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`In the Poker intellect, reason and heart call luck, intellect and reason to know how to play your cards right, and the heart to learn to follow your intuition."

"Poker is not just a matter of luck as they usually say that they know little."
 
cally

cally

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Love the movie Rounders w/ Matt Damon & Eddy Norton.

This one helps me LIVE: "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in your first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker."
 
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chloebrand

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"Without luck, the fish wouldn't play with us...
 
dexon303

dexon303

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"I will play any man
from any land
any game
that he can name
for any amount
that I can count
if you think I'm funny
put down your money"
 
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Bogdan Adrian

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Rounders : If you can't spot the fish at the table in the first half an hour, then you are it.
 
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RiskTaker

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"If it wasn't for luck id win them all" Phil H.

"To you this is is game, to me this is my life" Phil H.

"Honey, I'm all!"
After he took a bad beat:
"This donkey can't even spell poker." =)
 
B

BDK Shobby

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“I'm thinking, 'If he has a set, he has a set. Nothing I can do about it," Daniel Negreanu
 
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