I need a pep talk
So I'm now the cliche tilt boy.
I started my journey to be a solid winning player following bank roll management in July and have since increased my initial $20 to as much as $220. However I've been under a really bad swing over the past two weeks at .05/.10 and after dropping nearly $50 i proceeded to tilt myself down to $110. I have successfully killed monthes of grinding in a matter of days and it is making me sick.
I like to think I'm a good player. When I play my game and think I can crush the microstakes and have long looked forward to moving up. Now I can't even think straight when I play. Just knowing that I only have $110 now is killing me because I worked so hard to get over $200.
I don't want to quit playing, but I don't know how I can control myself. I had the pacience of a saint when i played .01/.02 and I continued it into .02/.05, but I suppose I mentally wasn't ready for swings of more then $5 in a night.
I guess I need to go back down to .02/.05 now and work my way back up to $110, but I don't know if I have that grind in me again. Maybe I don't have what it takes to be a cash player, but the constant suckouts in tournaments and SNGs drives me insane too. I want to seperate my emotions from the game, but I can't seem to do it. As much as I tell myself "its just poker, play your game" it doesn't help.
I suppose its also a problem that college is getting hard and for the first time I'm actually having to work. Life just sucks right now and I know I shouldn't play when I'm like this, but I really don't want to quit.
meh one of these days