re: Poker & To anyone going to the Casino for the first time to play poker
1. When asked how many chips you have by an opponent, always miscount half way through and start again. Always do this in a childlike manner, and always finish by saying, "I never get asked to do this online."
2. Always look left, then right, before looking at your cards. If you happen to be sitting next to the dealer, exaggerate this action.
3. When you win a big pot always offer to buy the table a drink. When you lose a big pot, always demand that the winner buys the table a drink, or at the very least, that they buy you one.
4. If you are involved in a split pot, always make a point of tipping the dealer, and saying in a loud voice, "Here's my share dealer".
5. Always yell "One time", every time.