TheseNutsWin
Rock Star
Silver Level
I think i got some anger issues... lol and poker brings them out even more.. I hate it... Lately every hand i lose after having a bad run i tend to explode... I either yell something or i want to punch the shit out of my screen and trust me if i wouldn't have this nice 24" imac in front of me but my old laptop i probably would have.. I was always a sore loser and tend to get angry about "unlucky" things.. and In poker there is plenty of unlucky "right moves" . You can make all the correct decisions and still lose and that just boils the water inside of me.. I hate it.. After a great run in January , my best i ever had, this month i`m just stuck.. I have won and lost and won and lost and somehow end up at the same level i have started this month.. my bankroll has not moved anyway.. I play the same way.. I even think i play better then last month.. I try to control my limping in and calling OOPS with questionable hands( i guess it took me a whole 1 year of playing 10-20 hours a week to stop doing it) but i`m still not winning, better yet i`m winning less... This just screws with me even more.. I read 2 new books this month.. Killer poker and the Poker Mindset ( conicidentaly telling me how dangerous tilt is i should be doing better but i`m doing worse, mentally). I play a lot of poker for a full time employee... after work, sometimes even during work ( i`m so bad...), live games twice a week with friends, from time to time Atlantic City, i`m reading forums, articles, listen to pokerroad radio, watch every wsop, WPT and HIGH STAKES CASH GAMES that are on TV thanks to DVR. I think i`m a bit too much obsessed with it to tell you the truth... I dont want to quit but this anger that is in me is just killing me... I cant see anymore bad beats or i`ll explode.. lol Should i relax and forget about poker for few weeks? I dont want to because i feel like i`ll get worse since poker is a game of constant improvement if i lay if off for some time it will take me some extra time to come back to where i am now... I need a way to stop stressing out as much.... Maybe i`m just not the type of person to be a good poker player.. I`m not a gambler , i actually hate to gamble... even in real life i need every move to be analyzed and make sure i`m making the right choice... lol I`m just a perfectionist... This is not a good trait to have trust me.... Well.. anyway I hope some of you can give me some input and tell me if you've been where i`m here and how you overcame this episode... maybe its not an episode.. anyway.. I think i`m genetically built this way... I stress too much.. My father stressed so much about everything he died of heart problems..... I guess its genetic...
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