Do you ever feel guilty?

I know the object of playing poker is to win money, and I know the ultimate goal in a cash game is to take someone's stack. I love winning. It's great.

That said, I felt a pang of guilt tonight playing. It was a 6-max $25 NLHE cash game with one loose player at the table. I stacked him once and he bought back in for $10. Then I stacked him a second time and he bought back in for $4. That's when the guilt pang hit. I just felt like, damn, this guy really wants to win his money back but only has four bucks. He put it all in on the first hand after buying back in like he was desperate to double up, and shortly thereafter left the table with the $4 still intact.

Obviously this is a good scenario for me and for other players at the table. I was very happy to have a winning night tonight after historically sucking at cash games. The guilt took me by surprise, though, and I can only imagine how much worse it would have been if I were playing a live game and some guy was rattling off a sob story about grocery money.

So... am I alone here or do you ever experience twinges of guilt -- or perhaps more accurately sympathy -- at the tables?

Sweetie, YOU ARE ALL ALONE! Do NOT feel guilty! What if he had felted YOU? He wouldn't feel at all quilty. Ummmm, you have to develop that KILLER instinct, girl! Good job, my friend! BTW, my friend Mo, is in the process of moving from Seattle to Idaho and he can't play in Idaho (that he knows of, yet, anyway).

LOL, I know... I'm such a softie. Don't get me wrong, I would have taken his entire BR had he laid it out on the table for me and still would have slept at night, but I still would have had guilt/sympathy mixed with the excitement of winning.

Poor Mo, no poker in Idaho!

I think that for the majority of players, poker is a long term money-loosing hobby just like any other hobby, be it going to the movies, playing golf, ... and actually a much healthier hobby the any other form of gambling as at least this one requires some sort of intellectual challenge. I certainly don't feel bad about taking the money from recreational players.

Then you have some people who actually have a gambling problem. I do feel sympathy for them, although it won't prevent me from taking their money. To some extent, i think it's good that they choose poker instead of a casino game as their gambling habit because if they ever get serious about poker and start reading books or forums like this one, they are somewhat on the right path.

dont feel guilty!!!!!! If he could only afford to comeback with $4 than he shouldnt be playing poker otherwise maybe he set a limit and figured he could loose another $4. Either way he made the decision not you, if they keep coming back treat them like the school yard bulley and take ALL his lunch money!!!!

i do for one old guy i regularly put out of our bar game he is such a bad player but loves playing so much hes always hangs around after chatting to me i dont feel guilty enough to tell him how i know when hes on a bluff though

I have a little story.

I had my first fight in MMA as an amateur last year. I was pretty hyped about it.. when I got in the cage, I took my opponent down and was about to wail on him.. but I hesitated. I didn't want to hurt him. Later in the 2nd round, he got the upper hand and gave me some nice shots on the ground.. and he ended up beating me by a rear naked choke 2:01 into the 2nd round. I threw only 3 punches in that fight (to the ribs, while on the ground)... I tossed him around a bit and went for submissions during that whole fight.

I could have finished that fight early in the middle of the 1st round.. but I didn't want to hurt him. I didn't have that "killer instinct" at the time. The thing is, we both knew what were getting into, and I should have not felt guilty in trying to beat him up.

In the case of your poker games... everyone at the table knows what they are getting themselves into. You all know that you could lose your money, and you take that risk. There is no need to feel guilty. I found that out the hard way in MMA.

RCat, I wouldn't worry about taking money from online players. They know what's up.

To play online you have to want to play poker, have internet access, make a deposit, etc... They'll be fine.

If they do have a problem then winning is probably the worst thing for them anyway.

I would just like to say I am a one legged blind deaf orphan trying to earn enough at the tables to fend my fellow orphans in Western Sahara from starvation. Please keep this in mind when you see me on the felt.

Interesting analogy, Mortis, and very appropriate! I can imagine in a situation like that, when you actually have to physically harm your opponent, it would be even more difficult.

Believe me, I bookmarked this guy and will look for him again.

The opponent put the money in play. If you don't take it, someone else will.

I play regularly in a poker club where I live. The cash games which are 25/50 and 1/2 attract a lot of characters. You got everything from doctors, lawyers and professors to drug dealers and bums.

Most of the players are truly gamblers. One of my favorites is this dude called Donkey Don. Donkey Don is about 400 pounds, and as dumb as a brick. Donkey Don will play every pot, and any two cards, and he'll call any raise. With anything. I've seen him call a 8bb preflop raise with 84o and triumphantly show down a full house when he hits the flop just right. Of course, since Donkey Don's 84o sometimes fail to make a full house, Donkey loses. On average. A lot.

So should we feel sorry for Donkey Don? Maybe. In addition to being a 400 pound lonely man who is as dumb as a brick, he also has a serious gambling problem. I personally don't feel sorry for him. This is a free country. Poker is like everything else. If you overdo it, it can hurt you. Its up to you, not the government, your neighbor, your mom, or your poker opponents to make sure you don't die from drinking too much, take too many drugs, have too much sex, or don't gamble away the ranch. Which is why every time Donkey Don sits down at my table I am hoping he calls my raise with 84o. Bring it on big boy.

Hmm, Roundcat, if I ever see that name at a table I'll type 'please Roundcat don't raise me anymore, I'm almost broke'.
I might get off the hook then, which would be a first.
Conclusion: LISTEN TO YOUR CONSCIENCE ! (especially when I'm at the table)

What?

I know what you mean, Roundcat, possibly 'cause I've felt like I'm on the other side of that sometimes.

I think it's something to acknowledge and accept the possibility that it's someone worthy of feeling sorry for, but generally work towards just accepting the situation, and the donations.


The exception for me would be something I recall from about a year ago, when a CCer who shall remain unnamed was reeeally drunk and spewing money at a cash table, mostly to other CCers. I think some of them offered the money back to him the next day.

YES I do feel bad for them but do not let it affect my play or sleep
same thing when you suck out on a better hand .

RC, never, and i mean Never feel guilty about taking someones stack, or your in the wrong game,, plenty of times ive taking my friends money at the bar years ago, left them completely broke, and never felt guilty about it, cause if they took my money they would feel the same way, then after the game they would say can i borrow some money till payday so i can buy a few beers, and id say ok,,, another thing is, if you feel guilty while playing poker you will not play as good as you normally do, its an all out war in poker, whoever wins, wins and whoever loses, loses, and thats the bottom line,,, i think however it is ok to feel a bit guilty after the game is over, but not when your playing,, buck

Feel guilty about taking someones money...laugh. Why the heck do you play poker then if not for the win? There is no mercy in poker and there never will be. And if someone goes on tilt or plays the limit he cant, then its sweet to take his/her money.

Sympathy yes, guilt no. Certainly don't delight in taking the money, just delight in receiving it

Goodness, Hon. You're too good. Yes, I could see this at a live table. Maybe a clueless granny or a handicapped person. But online is nameless and faceless. You are coming up with this stuff in your own mind. Don't let it haunt you. The person on the other side of the screen could very well be Bill Gates' kid who could buy and sell you 1000 times over. Poor poker players are not necessarily poor people. Take his $25 and be happy about it. That is your job as a good poker player.

(I'm not sure if Bill Gates has kids, but you know what I mean. )

Nuts, where's this poker club? Just kidding. Had Don is my sights

If you're feeling guilty, you must be in this more for the fun. I like poker a hell of a lot,but I do like winning even more. Winning, it's why we play isn't it?

Felt guilty about a suckout once. Then I recallled all the one's that got me. Guilt left rather quickly.

Poker's just a game. I'm a lousy player, as anybody who's seen me in the CardsChat tourneys would attest. But I know what I'm getting into. If I lose, I lose, and maybe I'll learn something along the way.

I was going to lie and tell you I'm extremely wealthy and don't mind spreading it around, but there are a couple people on her who know better than that.

Once at the casino I stacked a guy for his whole $200 (a LOT of money for me) when the board was flushy, I had the nut and acted after him, and he kept betting into me. I called and called until the river, when I went all in. He called, had a lower flush, and was physically affected by it, losing color in his face and everything. He did rebuy, and was mumbling to his friend for the next fifteen minutes that he "had to call." I have to confess, I did feel a little guilty. I was thrilled to have pulled off a successful trap, and I figured that the guy was probably a lot wealthier than I was, so I didn't offer him his money back. But I did feel like I'd deceived him; even though that is what poker is all about, I felt a little weird about it.

GW

I did stay and try to get his last $4, and bailed from the table right after he did... so my guilt nerve must not be *that* sensitive.

Taking others money in a poker game, online or live, is always a wonderful feeling. I get such a rushhhh when its a big live pot, I love it personally.

If you arnt there to enjoy winning(fun) and making money(fun)....why do you play? There should be no guilt, the other players are there to do the exact same thing to you, for the most part.

Something Like that happened to me other night except i kinda milked it a little to much ; / . One on One table 5 dollar buy in. When i saw this same guy join the table i would join it fast because i knew i could beat him but he wouldn't stop joining. Felt bad after 5 games and stopped taking his/her money and went to a tourney.

You should never feel guilty espacially at the table! Yes you were in a rebuy torunament and it seems like he spent some cash , however if you think about it he is trying to do the same to you and i dont believe he would feel guilty! Just keep up the good work and dont lose sleep over it...............lol

I wouldnt worry about it.
For all you know he may be like me,whenever you take my money at a cash table and you will,cos i suck at cash games.
Just know this i have $700 thanks ro freerolls and bankroll management,so if you take $20 from me,it wont bring me to my knees,He may have a story your unaware of.
Not everyone that loses money at the table has a sad story to tell.

Don't feel guilty everyone else at the table is just trying to take your money too!!

You do not know he only had $4.00 left, On the rare occasions I sit down at a cash table I set a limit of how much of my BR I will play. I almost never sit down with the full amount. He may have decided to play $20.00 of his BR bought in for $6, rebought for 10 then the $4.

i dont feel too guilty becuase when you lose money to the person i dont htink they will feel guilty. but if the guy says you took my whole bankroll its like you feel bad for the guy because you know that same feeling

no dont feel guilty, he wouldnt feel guilty for you in you were in his boots.... if anything at all, for me it would be something of a guilty pleasure hahaha

I'm with everyone, I would never feel guilty, online or live, even against people I know. I play to make money and for the love of it, so really what makes a player happier than making money...nothing

Maybe thats his way of being careful with his BR and sets a limit for himself?

Maybe he is thinking "Ok, I'll buy-in for $25 now and if I lose, I'll buy in for $10, and if I lose that I'll buy in for $4. And if I lose that, I'm done for the day."

That must be it. He thinks "My daily limit is $39."

I do not feel guilty about winning. There have been several occasions when I was on the other side of things and the other person was just nasty. I am losing my bankroll and they are talking down to me, etc. I guess that my mentality is to win with class and lose with class. There is no reason to be a jerk at the table.

This guy was surely tilted and has no bankroll management plus you got him right where you want him,trying get get even.This is where you really make the money...enjoy it while it lasts,cause next time..or sooner or later...it will be you on tilt or losing bad.