Playing with the donks later !

Ok ive gotten myself and invite to a 50euro freezout later this evening. There will be no more than 20 players, 2 full tables.

These guys are both compulsive gamblers and total donks. They will raise any ace, and king, all pocket pairs, and all suited connectors in any positon pre-flop, and in most cases call a raise. Otherwise they will limp with any two cards from any position.

They will call any resonable bet on the flop/turn with a gutshot, middle pair or any draw, and ive gotten called down on occasion with ace high. So as you can guess the beats are horrible

I know how im going to approach this game. How would you approach it ?
A few different outlooks is always a good thing.

I think patience and battling your own frustration at the standard of play are the keys to winning in games like this.

I'd play super tight and wait for great hands as most of these players will eliminate themselves without much effort on your part. I wouldn't run any bluffs at all and keep in mind that betting patterns/strategy will convey zero indication of hand strength. Wait for something good and bet it for full value.

You may also get some of the best bad beat stories ever.

You will definatly have to be cautious with TPTK cause since they play anything.. they can have 2 pair.. or mid pair... and if they are chasing.. you have to make them pay to chase

Raise with any good hand and push on lower stacks when you know you have them beat to whittle them down and eventually out. Otherwise, maybe you should try to play a couple suited connectors or low pocket pairs to get a straight, trips, or fh. Sometimes when in Rome...

Sounds like our home games, right LoDog? lol

Your best bet is to play tight, don't try to bluff and don't waste your money with c-bets. Only bet when the flop hits and don't overbet your hand so you can suck at least two or three callers in. Don't get too aggresssive PF with made hands because someone will call with A-x and probably hit on the flop. If you have the nuts and someone bets into you, re-raise, you won't scare them off the pot.

Perhaps let them play their game of bingo until the blinds raise enough for donk play to get punished most severely.
Half of the field may be gone by then anyway.
If you get involved in the early levels with premium hole cards maybe you could dictate the betting levels by keeping it fairly low thus minimizing any losses against super miracles by these donks.
If by what you say these players luck out on you when you commit large amounts of chips while holding premium cards, betting smaller amounts in such situations may help.
Of course, its not really the way to do things as a rule of thumb, but the frustration you must have experienced with these donks over the years/months could allow for such play.
Maybe also see as many cheap flops as you can find bearable under the circumstances to try and keep your stack in reasonable condition.
I am aware what I am suggesting goes against the grain Liam, but its just some thoughts on how to deal with these types of players.
Your own competent game will come into fruition in the later rounds and you can pick these guys/girls off at will when the time is right.
Good luck tonight, and sink a few for me.

tighten up. wait for solid hands. value bet the shit out of them.

agreed with most of the above; tight aggressive! Punish them with strong hands, and make them pay for draws.

What everyone else said, play TAG and use pot odds to your advantage. If they're as donkish as you suspect, you could win some nice pots making them chase with the wrong odds.

I'd play premium hands and throw in pocket pairs and many suited connectors. From what you're saying, your implied odds are pretty high if you hit the flop hard, at least if the preflop raises are small in relation to the stack sizes.

Agreed with most of above. All you'll need is a lot of patience and a wee bit of luck to hit a few flops really well and you should be raking it in.

i also would play real tight, at least for the first 45 minutes or so, then when you got an idea of how there playing,then loosen up, >>buck

TB how'd this game turnout?

Well this game turned out to be quite a joke.

We had 9000 starting chips, and the blinds starting at 50/100 and doubling every 10 mins. Very first hand i limped from the button with Q8o, and flopped the full house. I managed to get 2 ppl all in and tripled up on the first hand.

Then it turned funny. I raised from MP with QQ, got one caller. Flop J 10 Q rainbow, and open shoved.

MR Donk called with J 10, turn was a J , we both filled up. Obviuosly i have the better full house, OR SO YOU WOULD THINK. The donks insisted despite my arguements that we split the pot !!!!!!!!!!! I lose the arguement, and the pot gets split. Next hand with the board showing a club flush, and Mr Donk showing the K, they split the pot again, with one of them playing the board !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anyway it was probably the worst game of poker ive ever played, ended up all in about an hour in with KK vs A5 and an ace came on the turn. To be honest i was well out of it.

wtff. I know you said they were donks but, jeez. How hard is it to understand that Queens full beats Jacks full? That's pretty retarded.

I'll have to try some of those at my next home game, lol. "I play the board, we both have a flush so let's just split the pot". How about "I know you have top 2-pair but I also have 2-pair so let's just split the pot". How do you think that would go over?

DITTO!!!

I'd want my 50 euro refunded. Thats a joke.

You are all better people than me as I would have been throwing chips and smashing beer bottles (whisky in your case lad)! Next time you play bring a legit document with hand rankings lol.

That is the most bizarre thing I've heard of at a poker table ever. I wish I could go back in time to the time when a guy rivered a one-outer for his straight flush to be my straight flush and say "We both have straight flushes, let's split it..... " Of course I probably would have gone on TILT until I either won the damn thing or donked off all my checks.

I would agree with that cause whom ever is running the show tells me specifically that JJ's full beat QQ's.. if they say that I would never ever go back again.

O.K. this has been grinding at me for days now. These guys absolutely screwed you Tenbob, and I am pissed about it! So here is a letter for you to give to them, or read out loud!

Dear Euro friends(DONKS),

I am very upset at the outcome of the poker game the other night! You all agreed to split the pot when I had a better full house! It was NOT a splitting case!! The area in BLUE shows our exact situation. I've included all the rankings so you will know how to play next time!

This has been taken from the Official hand ranking rules:

• Royal Flush - The best possible hand. Ace, King, Queen, Jack and 10, all of the same suit.
• Straight Flush - A straight flush is a straight (5 cards in order, such as 7-8-9-10-J) that are all of the same suit. As in a regular straight, you can have an ace either high (A-K-Q-J-T) or low (A-2-3-4-5). You can not use the Ace in a wraparound and example would be K-A-2-3-4, which is not a straight.
• Four of a Kind - Four cards of the same rank like four Aces or Four Kings. If there are two or more hands that qualify, the hand with the higher-rank four of a kind wins.
• Full House - A full house is a three of a kind and a pair, such as K-K-K-2-2. When there are two full houses the tie is broken by the three of a kind. An example would be J-J-J-5-5 would beat 9-9-9-A-A. If for some reason the three of a kind cannot determine the victor then you go to the pair to decide (this would only happen in a game with wild cards).
  
• Flush - A flush is a hand where all of the cards are the same suit, such as A-J-9-7-5, all of Diamonds. When flushes ties, follow the rules for High Card.
• Straight - Five cards in rank order, but not of the same suit (it can be any combination of the four suits). An example of a straight is 2-3-4-5-6. The Ace can either be high or low card, either A-2-3-4-5 or 10-J-Q-K-A. Wraparounds are not allowed (an example being K-A-2-3-4). When two straights tie, the highest straight wins, K-Q-J-10-9 would beat 5-4-3-2-A. If two straights have the same value, AKQJT vs AKQJT, the pot is split.
• Three of a Kind - Three cards of any rank with the remaining cards not being a pair (that would be a full house if it were). Once again the highest ranking three of a kind would win. K-K-K-2-4 would beat Q-Q-Q-2-3. If both are the same rank (only in a wild card game), then the High Card rule come into effect with the remaining two.
• Two Pair - Two distinct pairs of card and a 5th card. The highest ranking pair wins ties. If both hands have the same high pair, the second pair wins. If both hands have the same pairs, the high card wins.
• Pair - One pair with three distinct cards. Highest ranking pair wins. High card breaks ties.
• High Card - When a hand has none of the above qualifications of any of the ones listed above, nobody has even a pair or better, then it comes down to who is holding the highest ranking card. If there is a tie for the high card then the next high card determines the pot, if that card is a tie than it continues down till the third, fourth, and fifth card. The High card is also used to break ties when the high hands both have the same type of hand (pair, flush, straight, etc).

Now that you see the official ruling on the full house rankings and realize that you have totally screwed me out of my 50 euro, I either expect a full refund, or a free entry to the next tournament!! Please display these hand rankings at the next game so you don't forget that a pair of Aces beats a pair of 2's, even though 2 is greater than 1!!

Love,

Tenbob

The part in parentheses is wrong, though. Those rules must not be meant for hold 'em.

I'm sorry TB, that completely sucks. I'm surprised you let the matter go though! There would have been no way in hell I would have let that arguement go (unless of course there was a distinct possibility of being taking out in the alley and pummeled). ARGH! That really chaps my hide, and I wasn't even there! Sorry it went so badly for you. God, completely unbelievable donkishness.

There was.

Edit : Great letter Sammy, rep +

I'd say alley here we come

Still BS, liam. I'd have been given the pummelling. If they want to be playing for 50 bones, they have to know the flippin rules at least.
I'm pretty surprised that you let it go; if not out of frustration, then out of getting your refund from the donkeys.

Yeah, baby! TB, you should have told them some e-THUGS got your back!

lol i don't think Jamile would need it...have you seen a picture of that monster!!!!

Yikes! When you said donks, I didn't know you meant DONKS! I like the idea of sharing the rules with them. I also like the idea of inviting all your -E-thug CC-buddies to come help you bonk the donks and get your money back. What a horribly frustrating experience!